Meow.

cradily:

i dont just take naps i accidentally hibernate

perfumeandpancakes:

ellen degeneres can host my funeral

religiousmom:

do you ever wanna listen to music but every song is just not the right song

poyzn:

This is like installing Windows on a Mac.

10moonymhrivertam:

bcperfect:

maybe the reason why some of us stay up all night and sleep all day is because we were meant to live on the other side of the planet

….This makes a disturbing amount of sense…

dontkillchic:

aluminumapples:

dontkillchic:

holyjazspers:

dontkillchic:

DOES FANNY MEAN SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN AMERICA BECAUSE PEOPLE DO NOT “SHAKE THEIR FANNY” HERE OKAY THEY JUST DONT

wait what does fanny mean in england

VAGINA

in america fanny means butt because we don’t have vaginas. the government refuses to acknowledge their existence.

hands over ownership of this post 2 u

Is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me.
J.K. Rowling (via kushandwizdom)

absentions:

girls who can run in heels should be feared

nudiemuse:

OMG NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *dead*

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said  “Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad) I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.
You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.

You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

It’s ridiculous that celebrities can spend a year of my college tuition on like, a necklace like it’s nothing and I can’t even afford a taco.